A Bit Worried…

I can not even remember the last time I had my period.  As paranoid as I am, for a month and couple of weeks now, I constantly bought a couple of at-home preg. tests and always got negative results.  But that does not stop me.  I went to my doctor a couple of days back and had a test once again – still, negative.  It’s been what?  2-3 months that I have not gotten a “visit” after having had for a couple of months.  My doctor says it must be stress and I have to make peace with the fact that from the very start, I do have a very irregular cycle. 

 

I know I am still a bit young at 29 having 2 sons but I just gave birth to my second 6 months back and have not lost my maternity weight and most of all, I do not feel any enthusiasm to conceive again.  This is my second c-section and my recovery during the second one was much tougher than the first.  I told my self after my eldest son was born that I can have another child and so I did after 3 years.  But after going through a 32-hour labor (after my water broke, the doctors still wanted to see if I could do a normal birth so they said 24 hours will be safely enough to see whether it would be possible), a very long post-partum depression and a month-long continuous sleepless nights, I could not possibly imagine how to cope up with another ordeal as such.  Maybe I anticipated a lot during my second birth that it hurt more.

 

With 2 sons, my hands are full because even if I have help at home, I do not want the essential things to be left with another person looking after my kids.  It is sad to think that being a working mom, you have this 8-10 hour routine in the office alone so whatever is left which is supposed to be for rest is being given to my kids.  It is pretty important to be organized and balanced because maintaining this in the household is thrice as tough as doing it once.

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One thought on “A Bit Worried…

  1. oh gleng, i know exactly how you feel…i haven’t gotten any period for like 4 months bcuz of stress…i was like really really stuck with work in dec and jan…i only got my period this month and jus like you, went to the doctor twice to check if i’m on the family way…i guess it was jus my hormones acting up…anyway, i gained like 20lbs since the last time we saw each other but im slowly shedding it all away for my wedding this may…its really mahirap and frustrating specially for a fashionista like me…i cried when the astig pants i saw in one of my fave boutiques didn’t fit you know…even though from afar i guess r uterus r still friends and they communicate…i just hope urs will not influence mine to have a baby asap kc im not ready for that kind of responsibility yet…so shush…hehehe its good you took up writing here…now i can get in the know about what’s happening with you take care and do have some time for yourself…afterall, that’s all who we love

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